Common Mistakes New School Counselors Make When Trying to Be Solution-Focused (and How to Fix Them)
When school counselors first learn about Solution-Focused Brief Therapy (SFBT), it often sounds simple: focus on strengths, look for solutions, and help students move forward. In practice, though, being truly solution-focused takes intention—and a lot of unlearning.
I’ve made these mistakes myself, and I see them often in new counselors who genuinely want to help. The good news? These are easy habits to recognize and adjust once you’re aware of them.
Mistake #1: Trying to Fix the Problem for the Student
This is probably the most common one—and it comes from a good place. We care. We want students to feel better quickly. So we jump in with advice, strategies, and fixes.
Why it’s a problem: When we solve the problem for the student, we unintentionally send the message that they can’t solve it themselves. That goes against the heart of SFBT, which views the student as the expert in their own life.
How to fix it: Shift from problem-solver to solution-finder. Ask questions that help students discover their own ideas:
“What has worked even a little before?”
“What do you think might help next?”
When students own the solution, they’re far more likely to try it.
Mistake #2: Making It the Counselor’s Goal Instead of the Student’s
Sometimes we know what should happen. We want better attendance, fewer discipline referrals, improved grades. Without realizing it, we start steering the session toward our goals instead of the student’s.
Why it’s a problem:If the goal isn’t meaningful to the student, motivation drops. The session may look productive, but real change is unlikely.
How to fix it: Always ask:
“What would you like to be different?”
“What matters most to you right now?”
Even if the student’s goal feels small or unrelated, starting there builds trust and engagement.
Mistake #3: Going Too Big, Too Fast
New counselors often feel pressure to create big change quickly. That can lead to overwhelming plans that look great on paper but are unrealistic in real life.
Why it’s a problem:Big goals can feel impossible to students who are already struggling. When plans fail, students may feel discouraged or blame themselves.
How to fix it:Start small. Very small.
One behavior
One class
One conversation
One day
In SFBT, progress is measured in steps—not leaps. Small success builds confidence, and confidence leads to more change.
Mistake #4: Focusing on the “Why” Instead of the “What’s Next”
Students often come in ready to talk about what’s wrong—and it’s easy to stay there. Understanding the problem can feel productive, but too much focus on the why keeps everyone stuck.
Why it’s a problem:When the session centers on what’s wrong, the problem gets bigger. And as the saying goes: you get more of what you focus on.
How to fix it:Gently shift the conversation forward:
“What would you like instead?”
“When is this not happening?”
“How will you know things are getting better?”
The goal isn’t to ignore the problem—it’s to focus on how to move past it.
Final Encouragement
Being solution-focused is a practice, not a personality trait. You won’t get it right every time—and that’s okay. What matters is noticing when you slip into old habits and intentionally refocusing.
Remember:
You don’t have to fix students.
Their goals matter more than yours.
Small steps lead to big change.
Solutions grow when we focus on what’s working.
The more consistently you practice these shifts, the more natural solution-focused counseling will feel. And when it does, you’ll start to see it—not just in your students, but in yourself too.
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